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Monday, 27 June 2016

Every Child Needs Sad Books

by Addy Farmer et al

A story of friendship

Charlotte's Web, by E.B. White is a story about two friends - a naive, young pig, Wilbur, and a wise, kind spider, Charlotte. When Charlotte is dying, Wilbur is distraught and asks her:
“Why did you do all this for me?' he asked. 'I don't deserve it. I've never done anything for you.'
"You have been my friend," replied Charlotte. "That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what's a life, anyway? We're born, we live a little while, we die. A spider's life can't help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone's life can stand a little of that." 
Charlotte's Web by E.B White
Did I cry when I read these words - yes. Friendship will get me every time. It can be messy and complicated and it can be noble and self-sacrificing. Such a simple sentiment, 'You have been my friend.' and yet it's laden with a whole lifetime of feeling and experience. When I read this, I don't just think about the beautiful friendship of Wilbur and Charlotte but I relate it to my own experience of friendships and how it might feel should this relationship end with the death of a friend.


Okay, so, this is one of my all time favourite picture books. We have a tattered big book copy which was read and read to all the children. I barely had to look at the words to recall them. But I always had a catch in my throat here ...
"Then Bella did something very kind.'


I can barely say that line which sounds ridiculous but it is redolent with the practical-big-sister love Bella has for her brother. There is also the happy resolution of the MASSIVE problem (when you're 3) of losing a companion/toy. Shirley Hughes has a wonderful eye and ear for the way small children are and consequently we invest in their characters and dilemmas quickly. My children never cried when I read the story though, which makes me think that some younger readers are more Bellas than Daves. Unless they're baby Joes and he's just too dribbly.


If you want to read Kate Saunders' amazing book, prepare yourselves for Serious Tears. The Psammead is a sand fairy, thousands of years old, and it's a bit of a heartless monster. By the end of the book, the death of a young man brings about an epiphany:
"I'm awfully glad you're here. Can you stay with me?'
'Yes, my dear,' the Psammead said and gently stroked Cyril's cheek with his paw. 'I'll never leave you now.' 
From heartless to heartbroken. The moment is terrible and wonderful. And it left me crying at the transformation of the Psammead as well as the lost generation of young men killed in the first world war.  

Nooooooooooooo!


As a rule, I find that I cannot bear to read sad stories which involve animals which means that I have never read 'Black Beauty' or 'Warhorse'. Neither have I written a story with an animal as the central character. For me, it's too sad. I don't know why, maybe it's to do with their trusting nature and relative simplicity of character. Maybe I should challenge myself - that's what brilliant stories like this do to the reader.


Some less obviously sad books make me well up. 'Not Now Bernard' by David McKee is the story of Bernard whose parents ignore him when he wants their attention. They do not notice when he is eaten by the monster. They do not notice when the monster wants their attention. They are terrible parents. They did not deserve Bernard. The story-telling is relaxed and funny and my children laughed their little heads off but I always felt sad at the end and that lost child stays with me even now.

 
Maybe the saddest book ever; Michael Rosen's, 'The Sad Book'. It is not a book on how to deal with grief. It is an observation and exploration of the author's anguish at the death of his son and it is beautiful and true.


What follows is a brief list of sad books from SCBWI members.  Please don't leave this blog feeling sad, rather feel uplifted that we can produce such incredible human stories. There are so many marvellous books which make me cry. They do so with understatement and clear language and never become sentimental. They are books which confront our most challenging experiences and deal with difficult emotions. They rehearse life and all its experiences. They tell us that we not alone.

Every child needs sad books.

'The War that Saved My Life' by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley moved me to tears, although I won't reveal why, as I don't want to give anything away for those who have yet to read it.
Kathryn Evans
Kathryn Evans Oh me too! And so many books - Private Peaceful, Watership Down - books whose characters burrow under your skin and leave you ripped apart when they die...
Unlike · Reply · 2 · June 7 at 11:34am
Meredith Vigh
Meredith Vigh 'The Circus Ship' by Chris Van Dusun always brings a lump to my throat - its just a lovely, heartwarming story. And 'Charlotte's Web'
Unlike · Reply · 2 · June 7 at 1:47pm
Jeannie Waudby
Jeannie Waudby The Book Thief.
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 7 at 7:45pm
Jo Dearden
Jo Dearden I'll second Charlotte's Web (read it to both my daughters on separate occasions and blubbed both times)
Unlike · Reply · 3 · June 7 at 10:16pm
Jo Dearden
Jo Dearden I also cry at the Picture Book 'Dear Greenpeace' - not sure why, it's not especially sad, just something about it gets me every time...
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 7 at 10:19pm
Candy Gourlay
Candy Gourlay Dogger!
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 7 at 11:17pm
Addy Farmer

Sarah Broadley
Sarah Broadley Guess How Much I love You and Monkey Puzzle. Books that make you go aw!
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 8 at 2:42pm
Susan Brownrigg
Susan Brownrigg Private Peaceful and Goodnight Mister Tom.
Unlike · Reply · 2 · June 8 at 2:46pm
Nicola Keller
Nicola Keller I have a childhood memory of sobbing at Gobbelino the Witch's cat, and my babysitter being terrified that my mum would think SHE made me cry.
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 8 at 3:34pm
Claire Watts
Claire Watts Ways to live forever by Sally Nicholls. Pure brilliance.
Unlike · Reply · 2 · June 8 at 3:53pm
Olivia Levez
Olivia Levez Inconsolable after this one!
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 1:44pm
Addy Farmer
Write a reply...

Meredith Vigh
Meredith Vigh Also ''Library Lion" - that one chokes me up a bit at the end for some reason!
Unlike · Reply · 1 · June 8 at 4:02pm
Claire Watts
Claire Watts I've discussed books that made me cry several times with top-end primary children and find that things that have me in floods don't make them cry at all and in fact they think it's a bit odd of me to suggest that it might.
Unlike · Reply · 3 · June 8 at 4:20pm
Suzanne Afford
Suzanne Afford Ways to Live forever, Before I Die by Jenny Downham, A Monster Calls by Patrick Ness, that one had me sobbing!
Like · Reply · June 9 at 7:57am
Suzanne Afford
Suzanne Afford And Code Name Verity!
Like · Reply · June 9 at 8:16am
Sarah Jane Ling
Sarah Jane Ling I love a good cry!  Olivia Levez's The Island made me cry. Other recent blubs include: My Sister Lives On The Mantelpiece; Pobby and Dingan (sob!) and John Birnigham's Grandpa.
Like · Reply · 2 · June 9 at 9:52am
Jo Dearden
Jo Dearden Pobby and Dingan! I read that in a Granta collection years ago. Best. Short. Story EVER!!! Magical and gut-wrenchingly true at the same time...
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 2:18pm
Sarah Jane Ling
Sarah Jane Ling Agree - that last chapter is so sad!
Like · Reply · June 9 at 8:42pm
Addy Farmer
Write a reply...

Olivia Levez
Olivia Levez That awful scene in Goodnight Mister Tom. (I used to teach this one and always had to get a pupil to read it aloud because my voice would start breaking up.) A Monster Calls. Ways to Live Forever. Do they have to be children's ones? The final scenes in...See More
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 1:53pm
Nikki Sheehan
Nikki Sheehan God, I'm so damaged by that scene in Goodnight Mr Tom. I can't believe they let him put it in! Brilliant but just so brutal
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 2:08pm
Claire Watts
Claire Watts I have only read The Last Battle once though I have read the others countless times. I wish I could unread it.
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 5:06pm
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Addy Farmer
Write a reply...

Christina Banach
Christina Banach So many to choose from, including Elizabeth Wein's amazing Rose Under Fire. That really moved me.
Like · Reply · June 9 at 6:27pm
Lorna Murphy
Lorna Murphy Just finished 'Five Children on the Western Front' and I am now a mess. Brilliant book.
Like · Reply · 1 · June 9 at 6:56pm
Sarah Jane Ling
Sarah Jane Ling Time Traveler's Wife.
Like · Reply · June 9 at 8:44pm
Addy Farmer
Write a comment...



Posted by Addy Farmer
Labels: Addy Farmer , friendship , sad books

12 comments :

  1. Ana Salote27 June 2016 at 08:12

    Just reading those words 'You have been my friend' has me welling up. I wonder if she cried when writing them. These are the last things we say to each other, when everything else falls away and we sum our relationships in a few laden words. Rightly a classic.

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    1. Candy Gourlay27 June 2016 at 15:10

      I'm welling up just thinking about it!

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  2. Addy Farmer27 June 2016 at 08:55

    I know, Ana! We all bring our own sensibilities when we read these stories. Thanks for reading.

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  3. A. Colleen Jones27 June 2016 at 13:03

    Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson

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    1. Addy Farmer27 June 2016 at 17:49

      I've haven't read this and will add it to my list ... thanks for reading!

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  4. Ally Sherrick27 June 2016 at 20:06

    I'd definitely echo Bridge to Terabithia - a beautiful story and as mentioned by Olivia above, A Monster Calls - and still thinking of Siobhan Dowd, A Swift Pure Cry too...

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    1. Addy Farmer27 June 2016 at 22:22

      Oh, I agree with A Monster Calls and A Swift Pure Cry - the former story being originally Siobhan Dowd as well of course. Thanks, Ally.

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    2. Candy Gourlay29 June 2016 at 01:25

      A Swift Pure Cry! You've reminded me of how much I loved that book. Must read it again.

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  5. Janey Robinson28 June 2016 at 18:03

    Thank you for this post! I've just finished a draft of a picture book text about the friendship between a little boy and his pet, an old dog, who dies. It's with my critique group but I've been thinking about the revisions it will need and how best to handle the sadness / death - this is motivating inspiration and reminders of some great books!

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    1. Addy Farmer28 June 2016 at 18:13

      Great stuff, Janey! And the very best of luck with your picture book.

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    2. Candy Gourlay29 June 2016 at 01:24

      Janey, growing up, one of my favourite picture books was a story about a cat named Barney who dies. The child narrator is sad and lists 10 good things about his pet. Look for The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst. It's sad and yet wonderful.

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    3. Janey Robinson3 July 2016 at 20:33

      Thanks Candy!

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